Personal+Letter

Dear Dad, I’m writing you because there are some things that you need to know. Do you remember last year when I brought you my report card and it had 4 A’s and 2 B’s on it? I was so excited and when I brought it with me to show you, do you remember what you said? “Cool”. Do you know how hard I worked for that? You didn’t even care, you were so tied up in Todd playing sports and not caring about school like you used to. Well that’s just great that he doesn’t care about school, he’ll just struggle through life like you did. Do you really want to influence him in that way? I mean come on, you’re our dad you should be supporting going to school. But I know the reason you don’t support it, is because you don’t want to pay for it. If I had the money I wouldn’t even bother asking you to help pay for it because I know you wouldn’t want to. But guess what? No matter how much you don’t want to pay for it, you will. You have the money you just decide to use it carelessly. Every time mom and I bring up that you have to help pay for my college fees you say “I don’t know why you guys think I have all this money”. You knew this day would come, you knew I made the grades in high school to go to college. We have been talking about it for years; you should have been saving your money just like mom did. Instead you were busy buying material things for yourself; movies, cd’s, guns, and tattoo’s. Then you have the nerve to say “Well the whole reason your mom married that guy was for money, he can pay for it, because I can’t”. Well you know what, yes he has the money to, but he won’t because mom won’t let him. Do you know why she won’t let him? Because I’m not his kid! He has already put his 3 kids through college, numerous years of college; he does not need to pay for mine too! But he did tell mom that if it came down to it “David will go to college”. He cares that much about me that he would be willing to put his money out there for me to go to college on. Yes he is a pharmacist and he has a lot of money dad, but do you know why he is a pharmacist? Because he went to school, worked hard, and became one. You had a chance to go to school when you were younger but you chose not too and look where you are now. Constantly making excuses as to why you can’t pay for anything because you don’t have the money. But I guess you’re right that is a good enough reason for him to pay for my college, just keep letting yourself think that. You act like it's everyone else’s fault that you’ve been married 7 times and that it’s our fault that you have to pay child support for us kids. It’s no one’s fault except your own, you chose to make those decisions and you should never blame us for the mistakes you have made. The time I want to point out to you the most though is 3 weeks before I set off to go to college I met you at Ihop for lunch. I had just gotten back from my Michigan vacation and the week before that I had just went to an all day concert (Warped Tour) that I had been wanting to go to for a long time. So I began to tell you about the concert and the vacation, and every 30 seconds or so you would interrupt me and throw in your own two cents and that is irritating enough as it is. One reason is that you talk way over my voice and secondly you criticize everything about what I’m telling you. Why can’t you be happy that I went on vacation? Why can’t you be happy that I got to go to the concert of the year? So here we are, we don’t even have our food yet and I already want to leave. Next begins the talk about college, “so… are you ready to go”? Well I’m kind of nervous and I think I’ll miss home a lot. “Yes you will because you’re too close to your mother, you and her boy (my brother Kris) have always been that way”. Alright thanks dad that makes me feel better. “I’m just saying, you’re going to struggle because you’ve had everything handed to you”. I was speechless, my jaw hung open. I was feeling two things right then anger and sadness. I couldn’t believe what he had said. Next thing I knew the food was out and I wasn’t even hungry anymore. I went ahead and ate my biscuits & gravy because I couldn’t let it go to waste. When I was finished I began to thank you for the meal and you retorted with “I can’t pay for this I only have $7 on me “. Luckily I had brought my wallet in; on top of that the waitress overheard us talking and was kind enough to cut our meal in half. So not only did I have to pay for my own meal and tip her; I had to feel bad that our bill got cut in half because you decided to let me know you weren’t paying after we ordered. Finally after you had crushed my spirit, you begin to go on and on about God and the bible and how I should read it. How my beliefs of God and religious views are wrong and that yours are right. Well you know what dad for someone who has sinned as much as you have I don’t think you should be criticizing me because I choose not to read the bible. But go ahead keep knocking me down after all I’m only your youngest son, the one who has the exact same name as you. After the religion conversation ended do you know what you so boldly stated to me? Something that wasn’t even a part of the conversation? You told me “I should have just hit your brother; all I would have gotten was a fee”. My eyes started to tear up, I said that is the worst thing you have ever said to me. You then replied with “It would have been good then he would have had discipline and he wouldn’t have walked around all the time acting like he was tough shit”. I was quick to defend my brother and said he never did anything wrong to you, he just had a crappy step dad it’s not his fault. I then told you to never say anything like that again and you told me “I’ll say whatever I want about him he deserves it, he’s nothing but a momma’s boy and that’s all he’ll ever be”. I begin to gather my things and stood up from my seat. I looked you straight in the eyes and said he’s doing better than you. Then I left you sitting at the table. I was embarrassed that we argued in a public eating establishment, I was sad and angry that you could say such things to me and not even care. I left and went home and told my mom, my girlfriend Michelle, then later that night I visited my brother and told him about it. They all agreed with me that you had no right to say any of that and that I shouldn’t even speak to you again. I went an entire week or two without even speaking to you, and then I gave you another chance. I shouldn’t even have had to give you a chance to begin with; you’re my dad you should never speak to your kids that way. I don’t need another friend, I need a dad. I need you to help guide me, to teach me things, and to be there when I need you. If you ever did begin to do any of this, I don’t even know that I would want it anymore. I wish you wouldn’t have let it go this far, and I wish you could have treated me better. But no matter what you’re the only dad I’ve got and I will always love you.
 * __Understand This __**

 Sincerely, David